About Me

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I'm a work in progress. I'm a mom to two, soon to be three, awesome kids that have taught me things I didn't know I needed to learn. I'm married to a kind and handsome man that I genuinely love to be with. I like to be around interesting people and enjoy learning from others. I'm quirky, energetic, have a glass that's usually half full (of wine) and am spontaneous when it fits into my plans. My life is much slower than it once was and even though I sometimes miss the old days, I never take these new days for granted. So, I've given up alot of things in order to give more of myself to my family ... and they better appreciate it. I mean, I expect nothing in return for my selfless love.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Bust a move

This weekend has been FILLED!!! Nate and I have spent many hours reorganizing our house an rearranging rooms. I bought lots of storage containers so that everything has a place to live. Made my little organizing-loving heart soar. We had a lot of fun and worked so hard ... everything on my body aches. This morning we started at 8 and we're just now showering (Well, he's showering. I might join him in a minute. Heh.) My parents watched the girls for us and then we helped them set up their pool. Folks, it was a hot one out there today.

We still need to organize the coat closet and move the bins of out-of-season girls' clothes to the storage unit. Oh, and I'm going to buy containers to organize our spices and vitamins/meds and then organize my jewelry-making and crocheting stuff. Can you even understand how happy this makes me? Can you? And then to have a husband that's on board and supportive? So happy.

We also cleared out a drawer for newborn clothes. Awwwww. I know, I know. We took a moment to let it sink in ... <3

I love this picture so much, See how he's looking down at me so sweetly? This really shows how he treats me ... he is unbelievably nice to me and acts like he just adores me. He's very concerned for my heart and so gentle with it. He makes me laugh. He makes me feel cared for. He makes me want to be a better person. There are no stones unturned between us.

I love this man and his quiet humility. He leads us well with tender strength.

I love him so.

Friday, May 25, 2012



As Nate walked across the stage I yelled, "Yeah, Baby! Yeeaahhh!" and then I cried.

See his honor cords??!!

Family pics

Advisors and school friends
Time for presents and cards
My parents got him a Grace College frame for his diploma but the matte wasn't with it so it was just a really expensive, empty frame ... waawaaaah.
(They did get the matte and the dimploma has been framed)
I guess watching Nate read cards bored the life out of his dad.
I think he fell asleep there in the background. I swear, those Wessels' can fall asleep anytime, anywhere ... it's a gift that many would love to possess.
It was such a great day. So many people came to his open house. You'll just have to trust me on this one because I didn't take any pictures. :( We really appreciated all the people that came out to help celebrate!

I was going to write about all the sacrifices we made for this day to happen ... especially that first year. Ouch. But, I'll just leave it at this: we never gave up. Nate was committed and he saw through to a long-time dream. I'm so proud of him .... I'm also really thankful to have him back :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012


So, Nate and I figured out a system to get the pics on my iPad but they still aren't finished uploading. Instead I leave you with these lovely images captured on the world's lamest cell phone (at least it's cute) ...

This morning at the park
(neither girl is very fond of these spinny cup things but I refuse to give up)

Nate's graduation present from his youngest brother. Too bad it expired two days before graduation ;)

Taken during my workout this morning. I shaved six minutes off my run/walk time!
It was awesome!!! (The downside is that my round ligament pain was out of control! tonight. Wow.)

Some of the songs on my workout playlist.
Nate said I have unexpected music on my playlist and by that I think he meant outrageously good.


Tuesday, May 22, 2012


I can't upload pics directly to my iPad so I will leave you with pictures of Nate and I instead .... (hopefully graduation pics will be up soon. What a spectacular day that was!!)

Awwww ... with pink teeth and all

isn't he dreamy??

Someone was distracted and it wasn't me. I was FOCUSED


Friday, May 18, 2012


Nate got his honor cords this morning. He's graduating with a 3.9 something or other. Not bad for a guy that spent his first year going to school full-time, working full-time and having a new baby. He's worked hard for this ... determination, self-discipline and good stewardship. He did it!!! He did it!!! I better bring my kleenex to graduation because I'm going to need them. Nate asked my Dad to be the one to turn his tassel ... how endearing is that??? Ah, I love it.

I got new glasses ... I'm still not sure how much I like them, but I can see and I suppose that's what counts.

(iPad pics are so easy)

Pretty stuff on the side
I trimmed my bangs this morning. Nate was kinda nervous (it hasn't always ended well when I take bang matters into my own hands) and advised that if things started going downhill that l just put the scissors down ... don't continue cutting. I had a few close calls, but managed to take control of the situation and show dem bangs who's boss. Whew.


Haven't listened to them in awhile ...


Thursday, May 17, 2012


Our sonographer is the best. She spent about 30 seconds measuring the cyst and about 10 minutes looking at the new baby. The picture isn't the best, but at this stage it's hard to get a good pic because the baby is too big for an internal ultrasound pic, but is still too small to get a clear shot of from the outside. Nonetheless, cute. I love watching it squirm around and kick.

The OB office should be calling me sometime next week with the results of my ovary scan. Apparantly it's rather common to have a small cyst form in the ovary in which the egg was implanted ... they just want to make sure it's shrinking like it should. Other than that my ovaries look good. Good-looking ovaries. My self-image has greatly improved with this news. ;)

Today we bought all the food for Nate's open house. Graduation is Saturday!! I can't even talk about him graduating without crying ... I'm so excited for him! :)

Wednesday, May 16, 2012


I'm having an ultrasound done tomorrow to check up on a cyst they found during a previous ultrasound. I'm assuming everything is fine. Yes, I am.

My sweet life :)

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Becoming a Mommy (three times)

First time:

For a good part of my life (about 10 years) I was under the assumption that I wouldn't be able to bear children (without fertility treatments). When Nate and I got married we decided to take full advantage of newlywed life (heh) with the expectation that we would need to see a specialist in about a year. About seven weeks into our marriage I noticed that I was sooooo tired and my pants were getting snug. On a whim I asked Nate to bring home a pregnancy test, not really expecting much. The next morning Nate headed out to work and I decided to take a test before going to my work. When I saw two pink lines I was in shock. I was shaking and kept saying, "Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh." I took another test at work just to make sure. :)
The rest of the day was a blur and I could barely contain myself. When Nate and I got home from work I got out the video camera and handed him the positive test. He was ecstatic and also in shock. I was so convinced that this was a fluke that I told him this pregnancy probably wouldnt last long. He took me in his arms and told me that we would just enjoy the ride and not worry about things like that.
We went out to eat at a place called The Sandwich Shoppe and the owner said, "You guys us are all smiles. You must be newlyweds." Grinning ear-to-ear we told her that we had just found out that I was pregnant. So, basically the first person we told was the Sandwich Shoppe owner. :)
This first pregnancy was a very sweet time for Nate and I ... newly married, about to become parents ... it was so scary and exhilarating at the same time. We just had no idea what we were in for.

Second time:

We decided to start trying for another baby when Mazie was about a year old. That spring Nate applied to grad school, I started training for my first 5k and we were finally going on our honeymoon (which was to include a plethora of wineries in N Carolina). We decided that this actually wasn't the time to have another baby so we began taking precautions. A few weeks later I kept waking up STARVING and noticed that, despite my diligent running, my tummy was poofier. I told Nate that I should take a test just in case but that I really hoped I wasn't pregnant.

I took the test and said, "Oh, crap." I came out of the bathroom, held up the test for Nate to see and started crying. Apparently we started trying to not get pregnant a little too late. I cried for several reasons: 1) I had been denied private insurance and had no idea how we would pay for another c-section, 2) I felt guilty for not being ecstatic about being pregnant when I knew there were women out there that would give up many things for this opportunity. I was scared and felt guilty.

We called my parents and they said they were in the exact same position when they found out they were pregnant with me (my dad in grad school, no insurance, poor, etc) and reassured us that everything would be fine. (I mean, they had me. Of course it turned out well for them. :P)

I had a change of heart quickly and fell in love with the new baby. Our vacation included me sleeping a lot and trying not to vom, but we had fun anyway (sans wine). We moved back to Indiana and Nate began a job with benefits and the rest of the pregnancy was perfect.

When Freya was born I was overwhelmed with gratefulness and loved her more than I thought possible!!

Third time:

This time around we decided to just throw caution to the wind and see what happened. I had already decided that I wasn't going to take a test right away because I usually find out that I'm pregnant so early and my pregnancies are sooo long. :) I had some suspicions that I was pregnant (keen sense of smell, hungrier, etc.) but decided to wait until Easter to take the test. (Nate was neutral on that).

Nate was due to leave for Kyrgyzstan on a Wednesday for 10 days. On Sunday night I had a thought ... "if something were to happen to Nate while overseas and I AM pregnant, he'll never know!" It made me so sad to think of that happening. On Monday I went shopping with my mom and bought a test. I was planning on taking it Tuesday morning but just couldn't wait. I took it as soon as I got back home (my mom was still there helping me put groceries away). When I saw the two lines my heart skipped a beat. We had done it AGAIN! I was going to try to keep it from my mom but there was no way she wouldn't have figured it out because I was shaking and smiling like an idiot. I showed her the test and we cried and hugged.

When Nate got home I had Mazie tell him about the new baby (the video is on here from March). I told him that my mom knew before him and he wasn't upset at all. He thought it was fun that she got to be there when I took the test. (These things become less formal the more times you go through it.)

This pregnancy has been wonderful so far. I love being pregnant. We're thankful that our OB is socially adept and doesn't weird us out. Maybe we'll have a boy? A girl is fine, too. A healthy baby is all we really care about.

I still sometimes can't believe that I'm a mommy. After all those years thinking that it wasn't possible ... There is not a day that goes by that I don't acknowledge this blessing and give a quick word of thanks for this life. Motherhood has changed me and has inspired me to be a wiser, lovelier woman. I am aware of the heartache that accompanies being childless and that has propelled me to take this responsibility even more seriously.

Today I thanked Nate for making me a mother. :) His example of how to love our children selflessly has greatly impacted me. He is the perfect balance of patience and firm consistency. Our little ones feel safe around him and I am thrilled beyond words that they have this man in their lives to show them what Christ-like love is. He is perfect for us.

(and my goodness, he's handsome)

Remember that children, marriages and flower gardens reflect the kind of care that they get.

H. Jackson Brown Jr.


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

photo shoot

My father-in-law mentioned that Grandpa has also been reunited with Nate's brother Kenny.
What a reunion THAT must have been! :)

Playing around with the computer camera ...

My post-run glory
(and by run I mean a slow jog, but hey ... not too shabby for a pregnant lady :) )

Freya, Gene Simmons and I

Monday, May 7, 2012

May 7, 2012

This was the sunrise over Grandpa's farm shortly after he passed away.

But as it is written, "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined the things that God has prepared for those who love him." 1 Corinthians 2:9 ISV


Sunday, May 6, 2012

Grandpa Don passed away this morning. Knowing he is reunited with Grandma and Aunt Judy makes us smile. He was a lovely, wise man. He is missed.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Nate's grandpa went into the hospital last night and the prognosis is grim. He is a prominent, dearly loved man in the Wessels family and the heartache is felt deeply. Nate is taking the news hard.
Life is fragile. Hold your people close.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Mazie and I had a great morning together. I was able to connect with her again and we had fun eating breakfast and running errands. :) We had a sweet heart-to-heart about how much I love her ... and will no matter what. She was all smiles.

My dear Mazie (with blueberry teeth)

What I'm currently listening to:

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Our walk on Sunday. We have an escapee!

This week has been different. As in rather strange ... not necessarily in a bad way, but still ...

I've been spending alot of time at my parents', helping them put their house back together after putting wood floors down and painting the entire first level. I think it looks really nice and I'm so glad I can help them out. Organizing and working at a fast pace is my forte. My mom's? Not so much. :)

Because of helping my parents I've been away from home alot. I always feel a little discombobulated when I'm not at home. (I just felt new baby move :) ) Yesterday I was gone until about 9:30 because I had Freedom Groups. Speaking of Freedom Groups we learned some VERY exciting news last night ... possibilities of combining with another local church, expanding our ministry, etc. We were given an amazing compliment about how well we are doing and how effective our groups are. I'm so honored to be a part of this. Right now there are only three female leaders (Sarah, Lisa and I), but it looks like we might need more!

New jammy pants from my friend Beth

I spent much of the afternoon crying off and on. I think my hormones are a little wacky. This morning at Owen's both girls had a melt down ... especially Mazie. It was nuts. I don't know what the heck happened, to be honest. I was SO embarrassed and felt so deflated. On my way to Ft Wayne (I had an appointment with Ann) I called Nate and cried really hard. I felt better after processing things with him (putting that counseling degree to good use). When I got back Mazie ran out to the car and said, "Mommy!!! I'm so glad to see you!!!" Ah, melt my hurting mommy heart!!! Tomorrow morning we're going to go on a date and then run errands together. :)

My appointment with Ann was encouraging. She told me that I was right on track with eating "normally". We talked about "good" food and "bad" food and she tried to convince me that there is no "bad" food. Er. Come again? She sent some homework with me about it so we'll see how that goes. I told her that I really want cheeseburgers right now (pregnancy craving? I don't know) and that I was worried that I'm falling off the cheeseburger deep end. We talked about how I'm not binging on cheeseburgers, in fact I often only eat half of it (with only half the bun. wheat=sad) because I feel full and that I'm only eating them when I'm hungry. She said that was normal and that I shouldn't feel guilty. I told her a cheeseburger wasn't a salad (she acted so surprised ... lol) and she said, "You will want a salad again and when you do that's what you'll eat. For now, you want a cheeseburger and so you're eating it with mindfulness and in moderation. You're on the right track!"
Eating should be simple. Blergh. I'm determined to beat this and to just be NORMAL. I want my children to have healthy thoughts and feelings about food and I need to be an example to them.

So much to work on all the time. :)

And now I've probably said too much.